Archive | October 2015

I’m sick!

Hello everyone! I was just itching to get my hands on the computer so I could blog and tell you all about my day yesterday. So, I called my family doctor’s office yesterday in the afternoon to ask them if my other test results were back and if they were, I would be assured that everything was normal and can get on with my life peacefully because I’ve been stressing terribly about them! The receptionist told me
they were back but the doctor had not reviewed them yet and again I could feel my heart making its way up my throat to burst out of my mouth! For that second, I thought to myself, what am I going to do now?! For the past couple of months, all this hospital business has been giving me tremendous amount of anxiety. When I was younger, I remember that I used to go to my appointments alone and take care of everything related to my health all by myself. It’s not that I didn’t have anyone to go with me, my parents used to ask me all the time if they should come along and my mom would actually make the effort to get ready to follow me to the hospital but I would always stop her. I used to see specialists and surgeons to discuss new issues that came up all by myself too, I didn’t ever feel that I needed any type of support from anyone because I knew I had the strength to deal with it all solo. That’s how strong I was but now I freak out over a blood test. Every time I wait at the doctors office, I feel disheartened and think to myself that this is not what a 23 year old is supposed to be doing, I mean yes, people have to visit the doctor once in a while to maintain a good health but 5 DAYS IN A WEEK consecutively?! That has got to be abnormal. Last week, when I had gone to see my urologist, I checked in at the front desk, made my way over to the waiting area and sat down, I looked up and saw that I was surrounded by only old people! No, there is nothing wrong with old people, I actually think that they are very cute but I felt bad because I was the only young person waiting to see the doctor there and it felt so unfair. It felt unfair that all the other people my age are probably out there conquering the world and its successes, and here I am, once again at another doctor’s office waiting to get checked up for the millionth time! I guess I am just getting tired and feeling low about going to the hospital this much and it’s weighing heavy on me – WAIT – I was telling you a story right?! Oh dear, what has gotten into me, I just realized I was telling you about yesterday’s visit to the doctor and I totally went on to tell you something else! Anyway, so I paused after she told me that the doctor had not viewed my reports but then she calmed me down by saying that my doctor will be in until 8 pm tonight and if I wanted to walk in to review my reports with her, I can. So I rushed out the door and made my way over to the clinic. I waited for two hours, and finally the receptionist called by name to come in. The doctor told me the reports indicated that I caught an infection. I actually was not that surprised because for the past couple of days I have not been feeling well, my stomach has been hurting and I’ve been getting mild headaches and fever like symptoms; I knew I was about to come down with something. So she prescribed me medicine and I went home feeling like crap! I hate getting infections, my body feels tired and weak, I can’t do much or get out of the house, I just have to sit at home and rest until I get better therefore it’s just not fun at all! This is not the first time that I caught an infection, I have quite a big history when it comes to them and it’s normal for me to catch them but it gets annoying! By the way, since I will be out of order for the next week or two, does anyone have any suggestions as to what I can do while I’m home getting better. It gets pretty boring, sitting at home waiting for my body to bounce back and get stronger so if you do have any suggestions, please comment down below or tell me what you do when you’re sick. Alright, I’m going to go catch up on my favorite show keeping up with the Kardashians! See you later.

What inspired me to start blogging?

Ever since I was a little girl, I wanted to help people with similar problems like mine. I remember wanting to become a surgeon at the tender age of ten so I can perform surgery on people to help fix their bodies because like I said before, neural tube defects can really mess someones body up. For example, numerous people born with this condition are paralysed from the waist below leaving them to spend their whole lives in a wheelchair. However, I did not want to limit myself in just helping the people with this particular defect, I also had the desire to lend a helping hand to everyone and anyone who needed a little motivation in life. Anyways, as I was saying, I always wanted to put my story out there and talk about what I was going through physically and mentally in my daily life, along with all the issues and setbacks this problem was causing me, hoping to reach out to kids so they can gain the courage and strength which will aid them to keep moving forward. My main purpose was to teach them to not give any type of pain or problem the power to be an obstacle or come in the way of living their lives the way they want to live it. Every time I had to get admitted at the hospital or had to undergo surgery or even visit the doctor for an appointment, I always thought of documenting these experiences for the public but I was always so scared. I feared that if I told people about my health issues and the things I went through growing up, that they would treat me like an alien and no one would want to be my friend or talk to me. Everyone would probably just shut me out or the worst case scenario I made up in my head; laugh at me and call me names. Due to these fears, I crumbled up the idea of sharing my story and threw it far, far away and so the idea never came back to me again, I’d probably just make a complete fool out of myself in front of the world. But then, years later, an estranged, old classmate sparked this idea up again and slapped some sense into me!

Guess what time it is?! Yes, it’s story time, haha! YAY! So, about three months ago I was going through my Facebook, looking at how much more amusing and interesting other peoples lives are than mine and that’s when I stumbled upon this person who commented on one of my friends picture. He looked very familiar from the tiny picture I could see so I clicked on his name to confirm if that was the same boy from my middle school, and it was! Shamelessly, I sent him a friend request even though we didn’t talk much back then but we were in the same class so I did have a valid reason and no I am not a creep. Anyway, I didn’t bother talking to him because he was the smartest kid in class and because of that I felt he thought he was better than the other students! Moving on, he added me back and because we hadn’t seen or heard from each other in the last ten years he began by asking me how I was doing and what’s been going on ever since middle school. I told him everything, all the hospitalizations, the new problems that occurred due to my condition and the setbacks that these problems have caused. I also let him know the fragile state of my mental health. He first sympathized with me and then told me that I have a very unusual and interesting life therefore, I should create a blog documenting my life and maybe that can help someone somewhere who is going through similar issues. I told him that that was initially my plan but I felt a bit afraid so he told me that I should at least just give it a try. We had a full conversation about this and somehow he convinced me to create my own blog! So, here I am pouring my heart out to you all. Also, he is not what I thought he was. He’s actually a very down to earth, humble person. I am so thankful for this friend and if you are reading this, I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart, this is the best decision that I have made in my life! Thank you for giving me that little push and a dose of hope, I will always cherish you as a friend. Oh, and yes this nerd is studying to become an engineer, not shocking at all! So that’s the story of how I started blogging, basically living my dreams. Thank you for dropping by and stay tuned to find out the reason behind my blogs name and how I came up with it. Goodbye for now!

A Mini Heart Attack!

Hello again,
Today, I thought I was going to have a heart attack! Okay, not literally but almost! It all started when I was relaxing at home, petting my cat Aria, not having any plans to get up from my couch when suddenly I got a phone call from a ghost! Okay, it was just the receptionist at my doctors office but that’s almost as scary when you are waiting for your test results to come back! So, I answered my phone and she basically asked me if I was free anytime this week to come in and discuss my results with the doctor. I FREAKED OUT! No, this is not the first time that I received a call from my doctor’s office to discuss my results but for the past couple of days I’ve been paranoid thinking something was wrong with my kidneys therefore I FREAKED OUT! I thought they were calling me in to tell me that my kidneys have failed or there was something seriously wrong with them! FYI, one of my biggest fear is losing all my organs. I think it’s because I get infections frequently. Anyway, I asked her which result the doctor wanted to discuss to which she replied saying my blood test so my heart literally dropped to the floor, beating at a very unusual rate because I know that a blood test can indicate if your kidneys are functioning or not! Also, to my knowledge, they only call the patient in to discuss the reports when they find something abnormal in the tests. At that moment, I thought I was done for it. My brain jumped to insane conclusions as to what could have gone wrong with my kidneys. It felt like today was the last day for me to live on this Earth, I wanted to find a huge rock and live underneath it forever and never see anyone ever again! But, I got myself together and asked her if I could come in today and she answered yes. Thank goodness because I do not know what my mental state would become if I had to wait even another day to find out what was wrong with me and my kidneys. So, I quickly got dressed and made my way over to the clinic. I waited for about ten minutes and they finally asked me to come inside. The doctor sat down and opened my file up while my heart was slowly making its way up my throat to burst out of my mouth but then she softly said, “everything is normal, there is nothing to worry about, we sometimes call in the patient to review the tests even if they come out to be normal.” I couldn’t believe my ears so I asked her to repeat herself. I asked her again the third time if she was sure that everything was normal and she replied assuring me that I’m pretty healthy, I giggled thinking maybe she hadn’t read my previous medical history properly. My brain completely zoned out at this point because I was thanking God so much for not letting anything happen to my kidneys so I didn’t bother listening to her further. I became so brain dead that the receptionist in the beginning asked me if I wanted to get my flu shot to which I answered yes and she told me she will give it to me after I was done talking to the doctor but I totally forgot and left the clinic as soon as I was done with my appointment. I totally regret it because now I have to make another trip to the doctor! I came home later that day and just relaxed. Well, that’s how crazy some of my days are like! Hope you enjoyed reading about the day when I had a heart attack, well not literally but almost!

Getting To Know Me A Little More..

Hello again! You all must be wondering, well we know what her problems are and what she wants to achieve but WHO THE HELL IS THIS GIRL?! Well I’m here to tell you a little more about myself so we can connect on a personal level. My family migrated to Canada when I was just 6 years old and I don’t think I can ever repay them for that! In my house there is my dad, mom, older sister and two naughty cats. I was always a girl that loved make up, fashion and everything pink, I actually wanted to become a make up artist at one point. When I am not wrapped up in my health problems or at the hospital, I like to go out and hang out with my friends, sometimes when I’m at home I like to knit and crochet while watching my favorite television shows. Speaking of television shows, some of my favorite ones are Keeping up with the Kardashians, Two Broke Girls and The Big Bang Theory. I also love some of the shows on the Disney Channel, yes I am aware of my age, don’t judge me! For the most part, I am a very easy going person, I like to surround myself with positive and good hearted people meaning I cannot handle fake, conniving and vicious people. I like to keep far away from them! I like to think I am still a kid at heart because frankly speaking, I do not like being an adult! I don’t like adult duties nor do I like acting like one but, I am very mature. I don’t know how that works but trust me somehow IT DOES! I am so not the serious type, I like to laugh, be sarcastic and just have a good time! Alright, that’s all my little, tiny brain can think of right now, I will be posting more about my likes and dislikes in other posts as soon as I remember them! Tata for now<3

Everyone has a story, here is mine.

Hello, my name is Samina and this is my first blog entry ever! I’m not going to lie I am a bit nervous and have no idea what I’m doing but let’s see how this goes. I am a 23 year old from India who was born in Qatar and brought up in Canada. I know, that’s pretty cool! I would describe myself as a very girly girl, I love everything fashion, make up, clothes etc. But don’t worry this blog is not another blog all about fashion, there are many great ones out there already! My purpose for creating this blog is to help and inspire others by documenting my not so normal life! I was born with a neural tube defect which kind of messed my body, therefore growing up I’ve had to undergo five surgeries, many visits and over night stays at the hospital; I can safely say that I spent half of my life at the hospital! Which is not a bad thing at all, I mean I had the nurses doing whatever I wanted them to do, a big television in front of me and room service! That was my favorite thing about being admitted at the hospital, I remember for breakfast, lunch and dinner I used to call the kitchen to order my meal and they would have some delicious choices on the menu. Sorry, I went totally off topic, where was I? Ah, yes! So, as you can see I am not quite living the normal life a 23 year old young lady lives, which is not the end of the world and I want my readers to realize exactly that, that sometimes life throws many obstacles in your way but that does not mean the end of the world. Everyday, I have to live with this birth defect which sometimes takes me in weird places mentally as well as physically and I would also like to take my readers along with me in those crazy places to inspire and motivate them that if I can get out of these places then so can they with any problems they are going through. I also want my readers to grow with me into shaping a better and positive lives for them. Get ready for a crazy ride! Goodbye for now!